Colbert: Sen. ‘Jon Kyl Has a Vestigial Tail’ Not Meant to be ‘Factual’ (Video)
April 12, 2011
(ChattahBox Political News)— Comedy Central’s Stephen Colbert had some fun Monday night, skewering Sen. Jon Kyl’s (R-AZ) absurd defense to spewing a bold-faced lie on the floor of the Senate. Kyl denied that he was lying his ass off to mislead the public for the purposes of furthering right-wing ideology, and anti-abortion hysteria. He told CNN that his lie about Planned Parenthood devoting 90 percent of its services to performing abortions, was not meant to be “factual.” Colbert suggested that Kyl was some sort of evil genius for coming up with an “amazingly liberating defense.”
In the world of lying Republicans, constituents shouldn’t take them at their word, according to Kyl. You see, politics is just a twisted game of street theater to these people.
During the heated budget debate that nearly resulted in a government shutdown, over the House Republicans’ demand that Planned Parenthood be defunded, many GOP lawmakers falsely portrayed Planned Parenthood as an insidious abortion mill. In fact, the majority of services offer cancer screenings, pap smears and birth control to poor women. Only three percent of its services are pregnancy terminations.
But Kyl, wasn’t about to let facts get in his way. He took to the Senate floor to demonize Planned Parenthood, falsely claiming that abortion is “well over 90 percent of what Planned Parenthood does.”
Said Colbert of Kyl’s whopper: “Over 90 percent of that is unbelievable, in that it is not true. Because only three percent of what Planned Parenthood does is abortions. Kyl just rounded up to the nearest 90.”
Such lies are rarely challenged by the mainstream media. But this time, the Democrats and Planned Parenthood pushed back. And CNN actually conducted a piece of actual journalism by demanding an explanation from Sen. Kyl for his brazen lie. The explanation: Kyl’s “remark was not intended to be a factual statement.”
Colbert went on to brilliantly mock Kyl’s “not intended to be a factual statement” defense.
“See? It was not intended to be a factual statement. You can’t call him out for being wrong when he never intended to be right,” joked Colbert. [...]
“I gotta say, that is an amazingly liberating defense. Now I can say things like Jon Kyl has a vestigial tail, and it’s not where you’d think it would be. There’s a reason he never wears a tank top. Note, that was not intended to be a factual statement,” said Colbert.
But Colbert wasn’t finished with his litany of kooky statements about Kyl, that were not meant to be “factual.” Colbert said “did you know that Jon Kyl has had sexual relations with all of his first cousins?”
“And that is intended to be a factual statement,” added Colbert. “Note, that last statement about the previous statement being a factual statement; that was not intended to be a factual statement.”
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