Alvin Greene’s Platform: Create Jobs by Making Toys in His Likeness
July 7, 2010
(ChattahBox)—Alvin Greene, the mysterious Democratic candidate for the U.S. Senate in South Carolina, has advanced a unique proposal to create jobs. Public works programs? No. Tax incentives for small businesses? Nope. Toys. Yes, toys, particularly action figures created in Greene’s likeness. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Alvin Greene action figures will save the economy and put unemployed Americans to work. Well, there certainly have been worse job creation strategies.
“It is clear, too, in the course of the two hours I spend with Greene that he has some pretty wacky ideas that, were he to win in November, would put him among the more unpredictable members of the senate. At one point, he lurches off on his big idea for how to create jobs in South Carolina.”
“Another thing we can do for jobs is make toys of me, especially for the holidays. Little dolls. Me. Like maybe little action dolls. Me in an army uniform, air force uniform, and me in my suit. They can make toys of me and my vehicle, especially for the holidays and Christmas for the kids. That’s something that would create jobs. So you see I think out of the box like that. It’s not something a typical person would bring up. That’s something that could happen, that makes sense. It’s not a joke.”
Alvin Greene is right about one thing: it definitely is not an idea “a typical person” would think up.