Great Snark: ‘Balders’ Say Trump’s Hair From Foreign Country

April 25, 2011

(ChattahBox Political News)—In a brilliant piece of snark, the Borowitz Report questions the natural born citizenship of Donald Trumps horrendous hairpiece. A group of so-called “Balders,” are demanding that Trump produce a valid made in America certificate of authenticity for the “hair-like substance that crowns” The Donald’s head. Unless Trump can prove to a group of crazed conspiracy theorists that his hair was not spawned in a foreign country, balders say he’s not eligible to be the President of the United States. Sounds reasonable.

The buffoonish Reality TV star has been spewing racist birther lies about President Obama’s legitimacy, as he makes the media rounds pretending to run for president. The morning after Trump penned an op/ed in USA Today, in which he seemed ready to back away from his crazy birther conspiracy theories, saying “I have spoken my piece on this issue,” he beat a path to Fox News to talk about birtherism some more.

“I don’t know why he [Obama] doesn’t just show his birth certificate,” said Trump. President Obama released his birth certificate three-years ago and placed it online.

The Donald’s birther roadshow is becoming so ludicrous and offensive, that a group of “balders” questioning the citizenship of Trump’s hair doesn’t sound totally insane.

“The group, who call themselves “Balders,” claim that the hair-like substance that crowns Mr. Trump’s head is from a foreign country, which would mean that the candidate is less than one hundred percent American.”

‘“Time and time again, Donald Trump has refused to produce a certificate of authenticity for his hair,” said Leeann Selwyn, a leading Balder. “This is tantamount to a comb-over of the truth.”’

Comedy gold.

h/t Political Correction

Photo Source: Wikimedia/Boss Tweed flickr/Creative Commons Attribution.


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